How to Self Suck

I am not sure if you heard the same fable that I did about growing up. Out on the tarmac in my middle school, people were always making comments about Marilyn Manson sucking his own cock. The legend said that he had some of his ribs removed to gain this ability. Although this is nothing more than a silly rumor spread by children, it does speak to the perceived difficulty of autofellatio (sucking your own penis). Luckily, you do not need to remove your ribs to do this. Just like HFO, all it takes is a bit of perseverance, patience and stretching. In this tutorial we are learning how to self suck. Lets check it out.

I have had interest in this subject for a long time, but it was renewed when my friend PE_Padawan addressed it on Discord. Apparently, he has been working on how to self suck for a while. My first question to him was “So what is it like?!” His response made me want to devote my life to the art of the DIY BJ. He said,

“Orgasms feel pretty damn good, a lot more intense than a regular one and (it may sound disgusting for some) the feeling of cumming in your throat (when you’re flexible enough) feels like heaven.”

Naturally, my next question was “Can you teach me how to self suck? I want to cum in my own mouth too!” (Don’t judge me people. I have needs!).

How to Self Suck: Is Your Anatomy Important?

PE_Padawan says that there are some anatomy related things to consider. First, he says “reduce belly fat as much as you can because it gets in the way”. It is easy to imagine how a little beer belly can get in the way. That could be a bit of a barrier to some. Additionally, he goes on to talk about needing a good amount of arm strength as you need to use your arms to pull yourself closer, which I would not have thought of. interestingly, he states that your penis length is not a critical factor and that “flexibility is key. My dick, when soft, is about 4 inches and I can still reach it.” That is great news! Even the less endowed folks have a chance, given they stick with the prescribed stretches. So, what types of stretches do we need to do?

How to Self Suck: What Stretches Should I Do?

Back when I was gung-ho on learning how to self suck, I used to try putting my feet behind my head every day, thinking that was the way to do it. Turns out, that is one of the most difficult positions to self suck. The P-man himself recommends an easier strategy.

His recommendation is to sit on the floor with your legs straight out in front of you. Next, you end forward and try to pull your head downward toward your thighs. Hold it for one minute, then slowly come back up. Afterwards, slowly bend your back the opposite direction and hold for a whole minute. That completes one set. Ideally, do this exercise ten times daily. Every day you will be able to stretch a bit more. Remember, your back is a delicate piece of machinery! Please take it low and slow. If you feel any pain, please stop. This process takes patience and practice! Don’t get in over your head (do you like puns?)

Thankfully, you are not going to need to learn a bunch of bizarre yogic poses to be able to self suck. The position that we are practicing during stretching is going to be the position we suck in.

What Position Should I Be In?

“There are multiple positions, some more advanced than others.”

You certainly do not want to start by putting your legs behind your head as I did. Obviously, we want to start with the simplest positions then work our way up to the more advanced ones. Our resident autofellatio expert recommends a simple position where you are sitting and you bend your head towards your penis using your arms to assist in pulling (again, be gentle). This is the same position that we do our practice stretches in. One day you will be doing your stretches as usual, then BAMN you will be in this position, lovingly called “The C-Position”. After you are proficient, you can move up to more advanced and exotic positions.

Next, we have “The Plow”. This position uses your legs as leverage. You lay on a flat surface and throw your legs over your head. After that, you place your feet on a wall and slowly walk your legs down the wall until you are in position to reach your penis with your mouth. I could see this position being rather easy to strain yourself in. Please, nail the C-Position first!

Lastly, we have the feet behind your f**king head position. I’m not gunna lie, this shit is hard. Not only do you have to be an expert autofellatio-ist-er, you also need to be a turbo, yogi, contortionist. Frankly, I am not sure why we are even including this in our tutorial– PE_Padawan says to skip it. We probably should. Or, we can look to this position as a goal in our lifelong journey of mastering how to self suck. You decide!

Is All of This Worth it?

With al this talk about stretches and taking it slow, you may begin to wonder if all of this is worth it. Honestly, I was beginning to wonder too. I struggle just reaching down to tie my shoes, how could I possible get my face in my crotch? The answer is that with patience, perseverance and the right stretches, we all can do this. Although, it does help if you are naturally flexible or naturally endowed of course. Whenever I start to think that all the stretching and practice is too much work, I just think back to what the P-man said,

“Orgasms feel pretty damn good, a lot more intense than a regular one and (it may sound disgusting for some) the feeling of cumming in your throat (when you’re flexible enough) feels like heaven.”

I think that phrase describes why the effort is worth it. That will keep me going in my quest to blow myself and I hope it does for you too! Anyway, that is all we have for you guys and galls today. Please let me know how your adventures in self sucking go. I am always extremely excited to chat with you on Discord or Reddit about your prejac, or self sucking experiences. Go blow yourself (then rub your dick in stinging nettle for a little treat)!